1. |
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2. |
31 (Gone Now)
03:10
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If death is a wound, then I can't stop picking the scab
No matter how deep I go I can't seem to bring her back
If grief is a cloud, then I keep getting caught in the rain
Yeah I know, that's just the way it goes when they go away
I miss those days when laughing felt better than saying
"Oh my sister was.."
Can I go back to calling you at midnight to tell you about the boys I dumped
Yeah I know; everybody loses somebody sometimes but
I miss those days when laughing felt better than saying
"Oh my sister was.."
Somethings just don't turn out right
What a big surprise
I kept on asking, you said we had plenty of time.
If God is a landmine, and there really is an afterlife
Then I'll see you on the other side
But some things just don't turn out right
My sister was an astronaut
She made you feel like the stars and the moon and the sun
My sister was an atom bomb
When she detonated the world felt less beautiful
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3. |
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Hey are you busy, can you spend a moment with me
Can you walk away to another room
Is there anybody with you
Can you sit for a while, I got something bad to tell you
It's your sister she got sick, and it's worse than we expected
We gotta hold her hand
Hey hate to bug you, bet you got your family with you
Have you told the kids, has the doctor said if they have a plan to treat you
I am scared, I can't lose you
"Don't be scared, I have so much left to do."
But you gotta hold my hand when I'm scared
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4. |
Pointillism/Did You Know
05:33
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I'm not feeling normal today again
It's getting late, I can't keep on getting lost in my mind
It all just breaks
We all die alone tell me what's the purpose
Each scar another mark on some fading canvas
And I didn't wake up like this
We all draw straws we all get shorted
We all get lost, and hurt, and hunted
And I didn't wake up like this
He was knocking S.O.S. on his wall to no one
Carving words against his breath in the window
I loved you better
////
Did you know that your time was running out
That you wouldn't be around
Did you know, and maybe you couldn't tell
Anyone that you wouldn't be here
Did you know?
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5. |
What You Left Behind
04:03
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When you're used to pain you don't question a stomach ache
When you're used to pain you don't question when you're fading
When you're stressed out, trapped in your house
Just go to sleep for a while
Would you still be alive
Would you still be around to see what you left behind
When you're used to pain you don't feel your insides unionizing
You've been tired for 40 years I guess now's the perfect timing
And when it explodes, a quick trip to the hospital
We'll wait until the tests are clear, and your oncologist gets here
Would you still be alive
Would you still be around to see what you left behind
(Mother, brothers, children, husband, nieces, nephews, in-laws, best friends)
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6. |
Separate Funerals
02:28
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My mouth won't close right
My teeth feel weird
I keep on waking up
To this god damn ring in my ear
So I'll spend the day in bed, cause sleeping in feels better than crying again
Maybe I can go get my mind right
My shrink tells me not this year
Maybe I can put my grief aside for a while and be better
Maybe I can go back in time right
And carry you to your final resting place
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7. |
Bridge on Fire
02:02
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Don't give a shit about flowers
Or the box they say they'll put you in
And I don't care about the words in your obit
Don't give a shit about your in-laws or their in-laws
Or the awful things they say
I'm getting really fucking tired of her banal pleasantries
She's fucking fake.
I know exactly what she said about my sister
And what you said to all your kids
Stop fucking liking all my pictures
And my online statuses
You used to say you couldn't stand my father
You know where his hands have been
But it sounds like you're real close now
Way to go man... It makes me fucking sick
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8. |
Thumper
03:49
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I'll make you the enemy this time
You paint all your pictures clean
Then blur out all the lines
You opened a can of worms
And served it with a smile
Were you even conflicted
I'll make you the enemy this time
I got nothing nice to say
I guess I should stay quiet
You let him stand there while you laid her in the dirt
You know what he did
I hope it makes your soul hurt
I'll destroy you
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9. |
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10. |
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32, first one without you
I smile different now, and I walk around with a hole in my chest
I hope no one notices
It's been a year since I gave up on my heart
It's been 4 months since your blood drained out of your chest
We offer our condolences
Nothing matters nothing stops
People die and you still gotta go to work
Put on a smile, don't be sad anymore
And if you try to just stop and let the world pass you by for a while
You will find all the hurt
Laying just where you left it
Got a dog in December, got a dog in July
None of them lasted
Just didn't feel right
Saw my ex where I fell in love
You were eating from a tube
Your body kept giving up
Then came June
Nothing matters nothing stops
People die and you still gotta go to work
Put on a smile, don't be sad anymore
And if you try to just stop and let the world pass you by for a while
You will find all the hurt
Laying just where you left it
32, first one without you
I'm getting older now
And you're down in the ground
...you're down in the ground
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11. |
The Storm (Angie's Song)
10:23
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You're so dead when mom and dad wake up
Sit right there, you can have a turn once we save the princess
Spread the blanket, you can't have a picnic on the couch
Go on taste it, it's not gonna kill you
Come with me, to my friends house to fix her truck
Come with me, if you clean my car, I'll buy you a snowcone
Come with me, we'll get fries and a shake to split between us
Come with me, to the place I found Jesus
I don't think that I'll get married, I'll be fine going it alone
Turn on the TV, we can try to figure it out together
I think I might like him a little.... Okay maybe a lot
You'll be fine in this house, but it's time for me to move on
One was dangerous
Two didn't know what to do
Three's a habit
Four didn't know how to find you
Five got some letters
Six didn't know what to day
Seven years is too damn long, I got kids that you should meet
Can we spend an hour
Scream at each other
I don't know how
To make it better
I'll show you mine
If you show me yours
I'm so tired of all
These fucked up scars
My skin is thick
It's starting to break
Am I cursed to have
No family
I'm right outside
Get in my car
And we'll scream until
Our voice is raw
Then cry out in
New languages
Can we rebuild this
Relationship
Can we rebuild this
Relationship
Can we rebuild this
Relationship
Do you think you might like boys? I wouldn't mind
I'm not busy, you're welcome over any time
I've been through it all too, if you need me I will hold you
We can make each other laugh, it's the best thing we know how to do
The devil whispered in her ear
The storm is coming for you dear
She turned to him and softly said
Hey Devil, I'm the storm.
I've been through pain, I'm not afraid
And if it comes I pass away
My soul is not for you to take
Hey devil, I'm the storm.
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12. |
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13. |
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You gave me a water bottle the last time I saw you alive
We talked about marijuana four days before you died
I got a call, 5 in the morning his voice was all broken and sore
I got a call, 2 in the morning the time you left this world
Please let your mother know, and make sure her hand is held
Please let your brother know, I'm sorry for calling your cell
I don't want to know you in the past tense
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14. |
Oda Mae (Ghost)
04:28
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I was standing outside myself
Looking in
Wondering how I got here
And if it matters if everyone dies in the end
I was beside myself
Wondering when you'd ever haunt me again
I had to remind myself
I wasn't looking for a shadow
Or some shell left laying on a table
I was looking for some evidence
You're spirit could remain
In a heartbeat, the intangible things, all the memories, not a life left fading
Maybe you could come back home
It's okay to be a ghost
I was looking for some good news
A lucky silver lining
A new way to look at the painting
Where my sister wasn't dying
I was selfish, and afraid
I knew you were in pain
But I guess I got your heartbeat, the intangible things, all the memories, you will not be fading
You'll live on through your sons kindness
You'll live on through your daughters stubborn nature
You'll live on through your youngest, she's silly just like you
You'll live on through your family
We got your blood, we got your heartbeat
You'll live on through your husband, through your friends, you won't be forgotten
But maybe you could come back home
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15. |
Call Log: 5/17/∞ (Sis)
01:28
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There are birds somewhere in the woods that know nothing about all this
They don't know cancer, or loss, or broken promises
They don't know birthdays past, or shadows left, or evergrowing stasis
They just perch up in the trees, and talk to other living things
Guess you'll be 45 forever.
Today you should be 46
Your personality in stasis
Your body locked up in the pitch
Guess you'll be 45 forever
Today you should be 46
Guess you'll be 45 forever
Anyway, happy birthday love you sis
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stags. Salt Lake City, Utah
I write songs about boys who kiss other boys.
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